How to Make the Most of Your Therapy Sessions

2 December 2025

So, you've taken the leap and booked a therapy session. First of all—high five! Seriously. It takes guts to ask for help and prioritize your mental health, and you’ve already done the hard part: getting started. But now you’re probably wondering, “Now what? How do I actually get the most out of this?”

Good question. Therapy is an investment—of your time, energy, and money. And just like with anything else in life, what you get out of it often depends on what you put into it. Think of therapy like a gym for your mind. Just showing up is a great first step, but if you don’t stretch, lift, or sweat a little, you’re not going to see much progress.

So whether you’re new to therapy or you’ve been going for a while and feel kind of... stuck, this guide will help you squeeze every drop of value from those 50-minute sessions on the couch (or screen). Let’s dive into how to make the most of your therapy sessions—and actually feel better.

1. Be Honest, Even When It’s Awkward

Let’s get real: therapy can feel weird. You're basically opening up to a stranger about your deepest fears, your weirdest thoughts, and your most embarrassing moments—and paying them to listen. It’s not exactly like grabbing coffee with a best friend.

But here's the catch: honesty is everything.

If you're sugarcoating your feelings, leaving out important details, or trying to "win" therapy by saying what you think your therapist wants to hear, you’re not helping yourself. Your therapist isn’t there to judge you—they’re there to understand you. And they can’t help much if they’re only seeing the polished surface.

No shame, no filters. Say the thing that feels too big, too silly, too dark. Chances are, your therapist has heard it all before—and they’re trained to help you through it.

Pro Tip:

Not ready to say something out loud? Write it down and hand it to your therapist at the beginning of the session. Baby steps still count.

2. Set Some Goals (Even If They’re Super Loose)

You don’t need to have your life planned out, but it helps to have a rough idea of what you want from therapy. Think of these as your therapy "GPS coordinates." Without them, you and your therapist might end up driving in circles.

Do you want to:
- Handle anxiety better?
- Stop repeating toxic relationship patterns?
- Improve your self-esteem?
- Process life changes or trauma?

Even if your answer is just, “I don’t want to feel like this anymore,” that's a place to start. Your therapist can help you drill down from there.

Goals give your sessions direction. They help track your progress. And on those days when you feel like therapy isn’t “working,” they remind you of how far you’ve actually come.

3. Don’t Wait Until You're in Crisis to Use Therapy

Therapy isn’t just for “bad days.” In fact, some of the most productive sessions happen when things are relatively calm. Why? Because you’re not in fight-or-flight mode. You can reflect, think clearly, and connect dots that you miss when everything feels like it’s on fire.

Use your "good days" to build mental muscles. On those days, dig deeper. Explore roots. Develop coping tools. That way, when the tough days hit, you’ve got a mental first-aid kit ready to go.

4. Show Up (Physically and Mentally)

Therapy is a commitment, and like any relationship, it only works if you’re present. That means showing up consistently—but also showing up fully.

You might be physically in the room, but is your mind still answering emails or spiraling over last night’s Instagram post? Try to give yourself a mental buffer before and after each session—like a warm-up and cool-down for your brain.

If you’re doing virtual therapy, close the tabs, silence your phone, and maybe even light a candle or grab a cozy blanket to make your space feel safe. Small things can make a big difference in helping your mind stay in the moment.

5. Take Notes (Yes, Seriously)

You don’t need to write a therapy diary (unless you want to!), but jotting down takeaways after each session helps. Maybe it’s something your therapist said that hit hard. Maybe it’s a pattern you just realized you’ve been stuck in. Or maybe it’s a new coping tactic to try.

Notes give you a record of your growth. They’ll help you stay focused on what matters, especially if your brain tends to forget insights five minutes after you leave the session.

And if journaling is your jam, go wild. Dump your thoughts after each session. It’s like hitting “save” on your emotions.

6. Ask Questions

Therapy isn't a lecture. It's a conversation. And like any good conversation, it's okay to ask questions.

Not sure why your therapist is asking about your childhood (again)? Say so. Confused about a technique they’re using? Ask. Wondering how long therapy is supposed to last? Bring it up.

Being curious doesn’t make you a “bad” client—it shows you’re engaged. This is your process. You deserve to understand it.

7. Do the “Homework”

I know, I know—homework sounds like something from high school, and no one signed up for that. But hear me out.

Therapy doesn’t end when the session does. It’s what you do between the sessions that really moves the needle. That might mean practicing a breathing technique, journaling, having a tough conversation, or just noticing when your inner critic flares up.

Every tiny step you take outside of therapy builds momentum inside of it. If your therapist gives you a task, try your best to do it. And if you don’t? Bring that to your next session and talk about why.

8. Give Feedback to Your Therapist

Yep, you're allowed to have opinions in therapy! In fact, your input is crucial.

If something your therapist says doesn’t sit right, speak up. If you feel like the sessions are stuck or not going deep enough, say so. If you’d prefer a different style or approach, let them know.

Therapists aren’t mind readers (though sometimes it feels like they are). They want the process to work for you, and they won’t take it personally if you advocate for your needs.

Think of it like adjusting the temperature in a car. If you’re cold, you don’t just sit and shiver. You say something and turn up the heat.

9. Be Patient With the Process

Let’s keep it 100—change is slow. And sometimes therapy feels like watching paint dry. You’re doing the work, but your brain still spirals, your triggers still win, and your relationships still crash into the same brick walls.

It’s frustrating. But healing isn’t linear. Sometimes it gets messier before it gets better. You might uncover old wounds, feel more emotional, or start questioning everything. That’s not failure—that’s growth being noisy.

Trust the process. Keep going. Think of therapy like untying a really tight knot. It takes time, and it gets tighter before it loosens.

10. Celebrate Your Wins (Big and Small)

In therapy, we tend to hyperfocus on what’s wrong. But don’t forget to spotlight what’s going right.

Did you speak up in a tough conversation instead of people-pleasing? Heck yeah!

Did you enjoy a good meal without obsessing over calories? Go you!

Did you just show up to therapy even though you felt like canceling? That’s a win, too.

Celebrating progress gives you fuel. It reminds you that all those tiny shifts are adding up to big changes.

11. Stay Open to Change (Even When It’s Scary)

Therapy might challenge your long-held beliefs—about yourself, your family, or how the world works. That can be unsettling. But it’s also where magic happens.

Stay curious. Stay open. Let yourself evolve. It can feel like shedding old skin—and that’s uncomfortable—but it also means you’re growing.

Change doesn’t mean becoming someone else. It means becoming more you.

12. If It’s Not Working, That’s Okay Too

Not every therapist-client match is a perfect fit. And that doesn’t mean therapy isn’t for you—it just means this therapist might not be.

If you’re not feeling heard, if the vibe feels off, or if things aren’t clicking after giving it a fair shot—it’s okay to move on. Therapy is deeply personal, and finding the right fit might take time.

Don’t ghost your therapist though. Have the conversation (it can actually be therapeutic in itself). Then keep looking for someone who gets you.

Final Thoughts

Therapy isn’t a magic fix, but it is a powerful tool. Like any tool, it works best when you know how to use it. Show up. Get real. Trust the process. Keep going—even when it’s hard.

And remember: you are worth the effort. Every honest word, every painful insight, every awkward silence—it’s all part of building a stronger, healthier version of you.

So go ahead and make the most of your therapy sessions. Your future self will thank you.